| 22.10.07 |
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it's the guy's birthday today... his 24th... and as the uncreative person i am... i did next to nothing for his birthday... wanted to get him stuff for his impending entry into the work force... so i got him a tie... and wanted to get him a decent bag for work... but he refused... saying he was happy with what he already had... and me, being the stingy me, was very unwilling to buy things for him without his approval... because he was the kind of person who wouldnt wear anything he did not like... so i had to drag him to buy the tie... and that's about it... i kinda messaged him two days ago... apologizing for not doing more... as lousy as i have been for the past two birthdays of his... but the guy was the sweetest thing with his reply... "i am happy just to have you... really" i melted. the truth is... i'm the lucky one... i dont think anyone can begin to fathom the stuff i put the guy through... i am quite a wreck... too emotional... occasionally insane... perpetually pessimistic... so many a time, i only see the bad side of our relationship... even though i blog the good stuff sometimes... the frequency of the bad stuff that runs through my head is probably a hundred times over.... but once again... the truth is... we've got something pretty awesome going here... i focus too much on his negative points sometimes... that i overlook his strengths... he understands me... and that understanding has been growing through the years that we've been together... he knows how to respond to my crap... coz i guess that comes with practice... but most of all... he accepts me as the person i am... the moderately evil... occasionally farting... me. and with that... he changed me... not with any particular mold of his fancy... but in a way that i think i've become a better person... i think it's a wonderful thing to be able to share your life and experiences with someone else... and for us... through our "formative" years at university... really... dont know what would have become of me... if it wasnt for him helping me through the last 3 years... but i'm just glad we're going through our last year together as well... so if there's anyone happy about having someone... it would be me... cause i wouldnt be anywhere without him... Happy 24th Birthday. ----Stef stopped rambling at 00:00 --Link to Post |
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