| 31.10.03 |
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realised its better that i keep my blog away from my frenz...
in that way i can speak abt wad i truly feel... instead of simply entertaining my readers... and trying to stay as non-critical as possible... today was really a day that i realise the failure of my entire life... think abt it... wad i went through today... i'm just thinking... wad have i been doing for the past two years??? being civil to a group of pple that are void of any concern for me??? the obvious answer is that 'they are concerned wad...' but sometimes the most obvious answer... isnt the answer at all... think abt it... went to sch... asked pple ard... 'ya... LT3...' so i thot i'll go there first maybe... everyone else went to the audi... when they realised the mistake... no one bothered to sms me... i oni went to the audi coz i saw pple walking there... did u know how i felt??? usual me went to confront them as a joke... but deep inside i was hurting like shit... seriously... at least i had elza with me... if not i would have walked out of sch... not wanting to see anyone in there... to pple who helped me carry the bulky dvd player for some time or another... thanks a bunch... but do u know wad seriously mattered??? after the feedback in LT3... i was the very last person in our klass to leave the LT... no one waited for me... or checked if i could manage... gawd... i couldnt even see the floor beneath my feet... heck... i could even roll down the stairs and break my neck.. none of u would even know... but before i break my neck... my heart shattered first... no one slowed his/her steps to see if i was okay... before u put the blame on others... check wads wrong with u first... i did... and my head hurts like it never did b4... coz i cant see wads wrong! tell me plz! edward couldnt make it for the movie today... seems like something cropped up in camp... gawd... was kinda prepped for today... but it had to be cancelled... went home... din go eat with the klass.. din wanna feel uncomfy... and in a way... din wanna spend another afternoon acting... too fatigued to do so... but i came home... switched on frenster... and rene wrote me a testimonial that practically summarised our whole entire life... i cried... truthfully... these are the things my tears should be used for... not over pple unworthy of my tears... ----Stef stopped rambling at 15:29 --Link to Post |
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