| 21.9.03 |
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was speaking to eugene on the fone yesterdae...
just a disclaimer... not the one in the UK now... heard the distinct sound of a lighter... asked him whether he was smoking... he admitted... matter-of-factly... i asked why.. and mentioned i never liked pple doing it... but matter-of-factly as well... he said... it makes me feel good... so i do it... if it takes 10 years off my life... fair enough... seriously... have frens who smoke... yes... my best fren in sec sch... my coach... uncle ben... so on and so forth... but like my best fren... she makes it a conscious effect not to do it in my presence... but this... has got to be the first time... that i actually am convinced of his case... for smoking... by the actual fact that he doesnt have one... and readily admits to it... *shrugs* i dunnoe... hearing him say something like... i wont be suicidal... if i had the guts... i'd be dead by now... my heart shattered... by the very fact that someone... anyone... has to feel that way abt life... and yet... am unable to do anything abt it... but in a way... talking to him has made me appreciate my life so much more... love everyone in my life... u made it pretty... =) ----Stef stopped rambling at 11:20 --Link to Post |
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