| 25.10.02 |
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hmmm....another long day today...
read YZ entry today before doing mine... aint healthy...kinda affected by his tone and mood in the entry... but have to say that i thot of what he thought of today too... its no fun growing up... its liek suddenly all the beautiful and best things in your life is adruptly taken away from you... =( too many things... today was quite an enjoyable thursday... though its one of the suckiest sch day... it was quite okay today... despite lectures being too boring... maths tutorial being too taxing... physics being too monotonous... PE being too tiring... i just it simply boils down to wat you make out of your day that really matters... if thats the case...i've really missed out alot in life... guess that my mind aint strong enough to overcome setbacks... been sometime since i stopped to look at the pretty stuff in my day... remember i once saw the prettiest blue in the sky... and how i rushed home and drew it out and sent it over to my net pal... he got quite a shock...but it felt good to share the little things in life that can brighten one another's day... eh...like trying out different bubble tea flavours and sending each other reviews on how it tastes... sending by post little packets of sweets and chocs...(in an attempt to make the other grow sideways...) or just composing a piano piece attaching it to our frequent correspondence on the email... sadly...these stopped... =P but once again...maybe its for the better... feel as if i've got lotsa stuff to say today... dont really know why... but things just start flooding my mind and i cant put them down in words... maybe its just be brooding again... thinking abt stuff i should not think abt... =P weak mind... on hindsight... realise that i've been extra hyper these couple of weeks... cant fathom whether it's just self denial of the terrible promo results... or that i've really started to open up to my JC frenz... (trust me to take so long to break the ice) cant tell...but one thing for certain... i'm like kinda wary abt the probablity of me really breaking down one day ...from the stress in council or my hideous academic results... its almost like running away from reality and trying to decieve not only the pple ard me... but myself as well... been thinking recently... can i really tell myself that, I am a good person. without batting an eyelid? sad to say i'm darn prone to self justification... and dont know whether to believe myself sometimes... hmm...think i better stop to let YZ read... he like so bored down there... so i shall be a Nice person and finish up... heheh... (actually...also becoz i got no more energy to continue writing...dead tired...) maybe tmr will be a better day? hope so... ----Stef stopped rambling at 20:28 --Link to Post |
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