| 5.5.04 |
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the run was difficult...
wanted to just give up halfway... but the "...just a little more..." mentality works all the time... finished what i set out to do... so i'm glad... lifted some logs... but slipped off the monkey bars... cant decide whether it was coz they were wet... or that the calluses (read: anti-slip) on my hands are slowly disappearing... sat for a long while at the hard court... stretching... but just appreciated the time alone... just shuffling steps by pple back from work... short breaths coming from the joggers... it was serene... nevertheless... i felt rejuvenated... at least i wasnt that depressed anymore... thought about loads of stuff during the jog... and the good 15 mins at the hard court... stuff i felt blog-worthy... but totally forgot... scattered pieces of my thoughts should read something like... "...no longer feel that much of a need to be a good person really..." the same way i felt after my training in pattaya... my this-is-the-real-world, take-it-or-leave-it experience... "...that it's easier for a bad person to do good, than for a good person to do bad..." coz the latter has something called a conscience... the very thing i've been wanting to lose... "...i should just sit in the front of the class, dictating answers to students..." instead of explaning to facilitate understanding... coz they dont bother... why should i? considering the fact that i'll still be getting the same amt of money... regardless of the effort i put in... "...why it took so long for me to overtake the girl in front?" fitness really going downhill... dont want that to happen... but frankly... dont know if i ever wanna go back to competitive windsurfing... ----Stef stopped rambling at 21:07 --Link to Post |
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